Now, being a bro, Entourage is one television show that has had profound effect on my development. When I first watched the show I couldn't believe how smart Mark Wahlberg was: this motherfucker just made a television show where the sole premise was a group of very close bros, much like my own, gets filmed for 30 minutes a week doing nothing but partying, driving sweet cars, spending money, and of course, banging hot girls. It was every guy's dream world. As a guy that's seen every episode, multiple times, at least once under the influence of various substances, I've generated a lot of theories regarding the show that I think every Entourage fan can agree with.
Through the first seven seasons, it's pretty apparent that Vince has never been a good actor and there's no way James Cameron or Martin Scorsese would ever let him in their movie: but it's okay because he constantly fucks the hottest girls and eventually develops a cocaine problem, E's a little bitch and no one knows how he banged Sloan but can completely relate to why she broke up with him, Turtle's the shit, and if this was real life, would easily be the most successful character in the 4-some, which becomes especially apparent after he dates Meadow Soprano and discovers Avion, Drama's hysterical and you're always pulling for him to get his big break, and of course, Ari is the easily the best character in the show, and is of course, the biggest bro.
Even though seasons 1-7 had ups and downs in both plot and substance, generally, the above points held constant. With that said, I was saddened to hear that season 8 would be the final season in the Entourage saga, but excited to see what Wahlberg had in store to end the story.
Three episodes in, I think I can speak for most Entourage fans by saying that I've been fucking pissed with the garbage that's been airing on HBO at 10:30 on Sunday nights. Wahlberg found a way to ruin one of the most simple, brotastic shows in television history. In just 3 thirty minute commercial free episodes Wahlberg managed to change Vince from a coke addict to Montel Williams, minimize Sloan's camera time, ruin Drama's career: again, make E an even bigger faggot, write of Turtle's hot Mexican girlfriend and sever his ties with Avion, and of course, make Ari, who's the biggest bro ever, not only lose his hot wife but pass up on a slamming 26 year old for a mediocre 40+. Not to mention that everything that was cool about the show: alcohol, girls, money, drugs, parties, and sex has been minimized in favor of relationships and character development. This is Entourage, not the fucking OC. Did Wahlberg forget what this show was about? Does he realize how with every new episode he's painfully killing the insides of every loyal Entourage fan who wants to the gang get back in the Maz and drive down to the Valley to kill it before they all head out and bang perfect-10 models one more time?
It's getting to the point where at the beginning of each episode, I sit down and take a deep breathe, and then hope that something good is going to happen. Then it never does. Watching season 8 is like watching Tiger Woods falter on the back-9 of the masters because he stopped being a sex-addict.
Whenever I heard that season 8 was going to be the last season of Entourage, I thought it was a bit fitting that the show that's held such a deep significance in my college outlook would be coming to an end as I entered my final year of college. After watching the first three episodes, I can only hope that me and my bros go out with some pride and dignity that has obviously been lost on the cast of Entourage.
-Dicky Fuld
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